What Kind of Asian are you?

Having been in the UK for the last several years I have met many different types of Asians, this has enabled me to classify them into three sorts:

A ‘Coconut’ – Their greeting is the pretentious Ciao, its one of three Italian words they know the other two are lasagne and pasta! They play tennis and drink Pimms, they think they are superior to everyone else and in Asian terms they think they are ‘Gora’ -white

The ‘Init Man!’ – bad boys/girls of the world who like wearing  trousers around their ankles while chewing their teeth with  sentences  finished with ‘Nuff respect you know what I mean’ and ‘Init man.’  They like wearing gold on the hands and ears and also their ‘Teeff’! They have their own language where words such as beer can translate to bacon, teeth are teeff and thief is also teeff,  to ‘ask’ becomes to ‘axe’ and hello is ‘Gwaan gwaan!’

The Pindoo’ These people have very draconian views, they believe in the pure race, no mixed marriages, you can only do certain things on certain days, no washing hair on a Tuesday, no metal items purchased on a Saturday and sneezing is forbidden in their house. Respect is coming home and giving all money to the parents and never challenging their views.

 

Do the test below to determine……. ‘What kind of Asian are you?’

 

Award yourself 5 points for (a) answers, 3 for (b) and 1 for (c),

 1)Your parents find out you have a boyfriend/girlfriend. Do you

a) Leave boy/girl immediately and marry the person your parents want you too

b) Tell your parents not to worry as you have children as well.

c) Invite your boyfriend/girlfriend for a meal and let them stop the night.

 

 

The full article is available in This months Edition of IKONZ magazine – available at most retailors

 

Laters baby JCx